Captain Caboose Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 Toby requested this so, Some backstory if you don't know: Matthew Santoro, a pretty famous YouTuber with 5 mil subs, was in a relationship with another YTer, Nicole Arbour. In September, Rob Dyke a friend of Matt's, went on Drama Alert to tell about a claim someone brought up about Matt being abused by Nicole. Here's the video to that: Now just recently, Matt had unprivated a video he had made also in September, telling about the emotional abuse and physical abuse he experienced in his relationship with Nicole. He deleted it a couple minutes later but several people had already downloaded it and reuploaded it. After this, he got alot of support for coming out with this confession and, usually, the accused come out with a statement. Nicole denied what Matt has been saying and says to move on with life and not grt caught up with someone you had a thing with 6 months ago. The video Matt uploaded: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZ27W2K12fk Alot of people think only women go through abuse and men don't. The reason people think that is because men don't confess to being abused by a woman because it defies the "tough guy" attitude. So, your thoughts on this topic? edit: here's the status update from earlier: http://forums.backpack.tf/index.php?/statuses/user/9660-ï½”ï½ï½‚ï½™/?status_id=347916 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tobiased Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 Setting me up for the fall if people disagree with this topic ​Link an image of the people who already posted via the status update. Some people made some quality responses in the limited space they had there. Edit: Thanks for including it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Python. Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 Male abuse is just as serious as female abuse. If you're in a relationship it requires love and compassion. If abuse is involved and directed toward either sex, one needs to make a change This is something most everyone can agree on. Male's are afraid of accusing their female counterparts as abusers because they'll be labeled as "pussies", but females are just as capable of anger and physical or mental abuse as males are but if a female comes out and says she's being abused, she's supported for her courage. The hypocrisy and double standard is exploited more here than any other case It's the same with divorce and custody cases. Sexism in these scenarios are against the man, so most of the time if both parties are capable of raising a child, they will go to the mother As for the actual story, until physical evidence comes out about the abuse I can't take a side. Nicole seems like a bitch though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fluffyy Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 i remember that chick, she made an entire video basically ranting about obese people from her point of view and got a ton of hate from it also she was naked in that one indie movie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buy my mixtape fam Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 Nicole Arbour is a psychotic, self-obsessed view-whore who wants attention and wants to be famous without doing any of the work. The fact that she assaulted him and kept him in her own home, after all he had done, taking everyone out of his life, practically stopping making videos, keeping all of time reserved for her, shows that she needs serious help. The problem with society is that it's easy for a man to be accused by a woman of doing something to her her, and then she'll receive an outpouring of support from the community around her. If a man does it, he's viewed as a pussy who can't stand a woman, and he looks weak because he "can't handle a woman". What people don't realize is that the same thing that happens to women can happen to men. A man can get raped, a man can be oppressed by the opposite gender, but he can't go out and talk about it because society won't treat him with the same respect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cleverpun Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DoubleStandardAbuseFemaleOnMale Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Omani Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 1:51 to 2:30 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♠Derpeh♤ Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 Alot of people think only women go through abuse and men don't. The reason people think that is because men don't confess to being abused by a woman because it defies the "tough guy" attitude. So, your thoughts on this topic? Think the general consensus is that when men take abuse from women they are "allowing" them to abuse them, there was this video a while back where it showed a couple fighting on the street when the women was getting hit everyone rushed to her aid immediately compared to when the man was getting hit most just watched on until the woman went "too far" (there was fake blood). But it is very true that very few take male abuse seriously think this was posed on a similar thread but basically summarises everything: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Discovery Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 Abuse is wrong, no matter what the gender. also she was naked in that one indie movie I'm gonna need a link for that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chilled Soda Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 Abuse is wrong, no matter what the gender. I'm gonna need a link for that Exactly what this lad said, any form of abuse is wrong and I think its extremely hypocritical if women don't take male abuse seriously (Many women I know in real life have said things like "Well its impossible for men to be raped" "Men cant be physically abused by women so you dont know how we feel" "Women need protection from men, its not like men need protection from women"), and its a ridiculous double standard that we have Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#NewWizard Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 lol'd @ title. OP can't be serious. Can somebody do cliffs on video? How was he abused? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Penguins Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 lol'd @ title. OP can't be serious. Can somebody do cliffs on video? How was he abused? I'm sure you still be laughing when you get abused yourself by a female and (based on most forumers are male) no one listens to your claims of abuse Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#NewWizard Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 I'm sure you still be laughing when you get abused yourself by a female and (based on most forumers are male) no one listens to your claims of abuse How can a male possibly be abused by a women? Unless she is some freak like Ronda Rousey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Caboose Posted January 13, 2016 Author Share Posted January 13, 2016 How can a male possibly be abused by a women? Unless she is some freak like Ronda Rouseythey emotionally tool with you to come back, they show how dangerous they are so it scares the guy into being afraid to leave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#NewWizard Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 they emotionally tool with you to come back, they show how dangerous they are so it scares the guy into being afraid to leave. What? Go no contact and be done with it. Only betas and masochists would stay in such relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supervise Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 How can a male possibly be abused by a women? Unless she is some freak like Ronda Rousey What? Go no contact and be done with it. Only betas and masochists would stay in such relationship. Please someone kill me, I don't want to live with these people any more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♠Derpeh♤ Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 they emotionally tool with you to come back, they show how dangerous they are so it scares the guy into being afraid to leave. Adding on to this: no relationship is worth any abuse. If you are in any way abused you leave, if you stay then you only have yourself to blame. It takes 2 people to have a relationship. Imo the only legitimate reason where an abusive relationship would last over a year or so is if you had kids. Beyond that you are now part of the problem as well even though you are abused. You chose them. You got to where you are today. You chose not to leave. Now stop crying on social media. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hyperqube Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 How can a male possibly be abused by a women? Unless she is some freak like Ronda Rousey What? Go no contact and be done with it. Only betas and masochists would stay in such relationship. According to some statistics, the ratio alpha/beta can be up to 25% alpha / 75% beta. So, even if 'only beta males' can be abused, that's still a large majority of men. Plus, what you just said, is a perfect indication of the problem: many abused men don't come forward, in fear of emasculation - that they will not be seen as real man. no relationship is worth any abuse. If you are in any way abused you leave, if you stay then you only have yourself to blame While I agree with the first sentence, the second is just good ol' victim blaming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♠Derpeh♤ Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 While I agree with the first sentence, the second is just good ol' victim blaming. It is my view that if you are in an abusive relationship and chose to stay in it over a long term then you are responsible for your decisions. You are a free human being with 2 legs you can leave anytime, do t get me wrong the significant other is a horrible human being for abusing but you can't deny that the perspn being abused is partially responsible for stickig around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Penguins Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 It is my view that if you are in an abusive relationship and chose to stay in it over a long term then you are responsible for your decisions. You are a free human being with 2 legs you can leave anytime, do t get me wrong the significant other is a horrible human being for abusing but you can't deny that the perspn being abused is partially responsible for stickig around. Agreed. Only exception is when a women traps with you with kids or gets pregnant without your (obviously male) knowledge. Then the women has the law on their side, either that or child support Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sniper Noob Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 It is my view that if you are in an abusive relationship and chose to stay in it over a long term then you are responsible for your decisions. You are a free human being with 2 legs you can leave anytime, do t get me wrong the significant other is a horrible human being for abusing but you can't deny that the perspn being abused is partially responsible for stickig around. It sounds simple when you say it like that, but psychologically it's not always easy to just walk out. A lot of times people who are abused are made to feel as if there is nothing else for them besides their abuser and feel dependent on them, which makes it hard to leave. You can victim blame all you want, but until you are in that kind of relationship you can't really understand what it's like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♠Derpeh♤ Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 It sounds simple when you say it like that, but psychologically it's not always easy to just walk out. A lot of times people who are abused are made to feel as if there is nothing else for them besides their abuser and feel dependent on them, which makes it hard to leave. You can victim blame all you want, but until you are in that kind of relationship you can't really understand what it's like. Hence its my view and I know it is very harsh. It really depends on how you think and how you were brought up. I don't think I can ever underatand the notion of "needing" someone since I think something along the lines of FU ive lived X amount of years without your abusive ass I dont need you. Staying together for the kids is a valid excuse to a certain extent but Im not sure how the idea of staying together in an abusive relationship is in anyway or shape a positive environment for your kid if anything it should make the decision easier for you :S Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#NewWizard Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 · Hidden by λngelღмander, January 14, 2016 - spammy/quoted spammy post Hidden by λngelღмander, January 14, 2016 - spammy/quoted spammy post It sounds simple when you say it like that, but psychologically it's not always easy to just walk out. A lot of times people who are abused are made to feel as if there is nothing else for them besides their abuser and feel dependent on them, which makes it hard to leave. You can victim blame all you want, but until you are in that kind of relationship you can't really understand what it's like. lmao. Such men are disgrace. Pathetic. Link to comment
The Penguins Posted January 13, 2016 Share Posted January 13, 2016 · Hidden by λngelღмander, January 14, 2016 - spammy/quoted spammy post Hidden by λngelღмander, January 14, 2016 - spammy/quoted spammy post lmao. Such men are disgrace. Pathetic. People like you are the exact reason why more men don't come out about emotional and physical abuse. Is it just me or is it really looking like a new Lou Zephyr? Link to comment
Captain Caboose Posted January 14, 2016 Author Share Posted January 14, 2016 · Hidden by λngelღмander, January 14, 2016 - spammy/quoted spammy post Hidden by λngelღмander, January 14, 2016 - spammy/quoted spammy post lmao. Such men are disgrace. Pathetic. What are they gonna do? Hit her back? They can't because that automatically makes the guy the instigator. The reason most men can't get out is because the woman is psycho and will smother him in his sleep if he even thought of leaving her. Women can be just a psychotic as men. Link to comment
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