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*sigh* Need help with a girl


Python.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, stupid thread, you don't care, blah. I asked reddit and no responses so far

Please, please please please please try to keep it serious. Girl forumers or people that have actually been in relationships are the people I need advice from. So without further ado, here;

 

I've known her for a week. We have more in common than I care to explain, but for the sake of this post, I will, because it will probably get the point across. We have the following things in common: both atheist, both have a cat named Felix, both like music and tolerate religion, both are kinda awkward and shy (introverted), both are smart (I have her in half my classes), both have lived in my home state (Arizona) then moved to the state we're in now, both enjoy quiet areas as opposed to social gatherings, etc. She'd rather be out sitting in grass reading than homecoming! (Amazing)

There are just so many coincidences and details that correlate with both of us, that I don't want to miss this opportunity. Here's the problem: I've known her a week. I was planing on asking her out this weekend, over Facebook (if I can find her, and yes, I asked if I could), as I don't have a phone at the moment, which is definitely a problem I see down the line, but that should be taken care of soon. A friend of mine said I may be taking it a tad too fast, I don't think so, but it would be nice to get some feedback on how long I should prolong our potential relationship to make the best possible outcome

Thanks for the advice in advance!

P.S.: If this all goes as planned, she would be my first girlfriend

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A week is way too fast to know for sure you have long-term feelings for her. It could just be a temporary thing. I'd give it at least a month before trying to make things happen. Even if she really likes you, a week is still too soon. But at least you actually talk to her, and aren't one of those people who "fall in love" with some girl you don't even know.

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How does she look like

 

Insensitive .-. if he likes her prob good?

 

 

A week is way too fast to know for sure you have long-term feelings for her. It could just be a temporary thing. I'd give it at least a month before trying to make things happen. Even if she really likes you, a week is still too soon. But at least you actually talk to her, and aren't one of those people who "fall in love" with some girl you don't even know.

 

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I've had wayy too many mini-crushes that lasted for like 2-3 days, wait a bit more

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A week is way too fast to know for sure you have long-term feelings for her. It could just be a temporary thing. I'd give it at least a month before trying to make things happen. Even if she really likes you, a week is still too soon. But at least you actually talk to her, and aren't one of those people who "fall in love" with some girl you don't even know.

As a person whose crushes have always been people he didn't actually talk to, that's somewhat offensive. I get a feel for people who I don't talk to, just in the things they say and the things I learn about them over time. Enough so to like them, anyway.

 

And like I said before Python, I think you should wait, lest she think you're too quick to love (Even I'd be bewildered if someone asked me out only days after meeting them, even if I liked them too).

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wow. why is everyone 16 on here?

 

Personally, if I were you, i'd ask her out during a common time, such as during school. ​That way, you convey your intentions better.

 

a simple "Hey, I like​ you, wanna go out/ do something?" is what would be pretty effective.

 

Asking a girl's perspective is okay, but each one is different. find out an interesting way to ask her out if you are that kind of person. throw some humor into it. personalize it I guess​

 

yeah. give it one more​ week at least.

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This is what dating is all about; getting to know someone. Don't feel like it's too fast as you might miss your opportunity later on. If you feel attracted to her, go for it! It would be better if you ask her face to face, though.

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I've had wayy too many mini-crushes that lasted for like 2-3 days, wait a bit more

How does she look like

 

This goes wayyyyy further than physical attraction. Her personality is outstanding and reminds me so much of myself it's mind-boggling

If you must know, she's cute

 

And like I said before Python, I think you should wait, lest she think you're too quick to love (Even I'd be bewildered if someone asked me out only days after meeting them, even if I liked them too).

 

I don't "love" her. I want to see what she's like. Share some experiences outside of a bus ride home

 

wow. why is everyone 16 on here?

 

Personally, if I were you, i'd ask her out during a common time, such as during school. ​That way, you convey your intentions better.

 

a simple "Hey, I like​ you, wanna go out/ do something?" is what would be pretty effective.

 

This is exactly what I was planning to do. I can't find her on Facebook so I'm thinking Monday, depending on the advice I get

 

This is what dating is all about; getting to know someone. Don't feel like it's too fast as you might miss your opportunity later on. If you feel attracted to her, go for it! It would be better if you ask her face to face, though.

 

This. Thank you.

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If you wanna be sneaky, try and make friends with her friends. That way they have an opinion of you.

 

"Oh I don't really know him" won't work to your advantage. And if you feel like you are just making friends so you can snag a date, remember that it's pretty likely you'll meet her friends anyway.

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play it by ear, go with your gut, provided you're respectful and understanding. the best way to learn about relationships and indeed yourself is by learning on the job, imo.

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how dare he fail to heed advice from the ultimate authority on dating, relationships and all teenage girls, a 17 year old stranger

And how is my advice any less valid than anyone else's? I'm a girl and I am still in a 3 year relationship. He asked girls and people who have been in serious relationships.

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And how is my advice any less valid than anyone else's? I'm a girl and I am still in a 3 year relationship. He asked girls and people who have been in serious relationships.

i never said it was less valid. i just made the point that he doesn't have to heed your advice, and it seems like you feel he has an obligation to. it's not about qualifications making your judgement objectively better; i've been in multiple longish relationships and i'm in a pretty good position to reflect upon them at 20 years old, and i disagree with your position.

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If you wanna be sneaky, try and make friends with her friends. That way they have an opinion of you.

 

"Oh I don't really know him" won't work to your advantage. And if you feel like you are just making friends so you can snag a date, remember that it's pretty likely you'll meet her friends anyway.

 

I think you missed the "introverted" part. She's extremely shy, and she opens up to me. That means something to me.

I've seen one of her friends before, but in the classes we're in together she doesn't talk much to anyone

 

Act nervous when you talk to her.That tells her that you like her <3

Take her on a date.Walk with each other on the boardwalk.the sun shining upon both of you.then you boop her wittle nose ;3

 

TIL I should live my life like a fanfiction

 

Or ignore my advice.

 

I read everyone's posts, and will continue to. Even though I don't reply to them doesn't mean I didn't take it into account

I appreciate your advice, as I do everyone's. 

The reason I don't want to wait a month is because semester will end soon and we won't be in the same classes. So it's now, soon or never

 

 

i never said it was less valid. i just made the point that he doesn't have to heed your advice, and it seems like you feel he has an obligation to.

 

I swear to God if you two start bickering in this thread...Take it somewhere else, with all do respect

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Posted · Hidden by OverduePixels, September 19, 2015 - Unnecessary post
Hidden by OverduePixels, September 19, 2015 - Unnecessary post

Also change your hairdo.That is not going to work out for you honey *mhmmmmm*

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if he ignores my advice, it doesn't really matter, because it's just an opinion.

 

after you ask her out. if it goes bad, just ask yourself if you walked out with a friend or someone you want to avoid.

 

if it don't work out, just try to settle being friends.

 

this applies to a lot of things. like the replies in this thread.

 

Even if** someone responds negatively, it's also your fault if you react negatively.

 

**Doesn't mean someone did

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You are moving way too fast. Its okay to have a crush when you have only known her a week but it is not enough time to truly know a persona and expect to date them. Work on being friends first. Ask her to hang out, go to a movie, go to lunch on the weekend and just generally do stuff together. Give it a month or two. Your feelings may have moved fast but hers likely havent. Having a lot in common doesn't always mean a relationship will work. You need to get to know her as a person beyond just your similarities. When you two are close enough that it seems like she is truly your best friend, then is the time to ask her out. Also, for the love of god dont ask her out via facebook, Girls appreciate a little romance so if you are going to ask her out, do it in a way that she will think is cute. Messaging her on facebook and saying "We have a lot in common, I really like you, be my girlfriend" is not going to get her to say yes. Taking her to lunch and making her laugh will get a much better response.

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